Top Ten Fictional Athletes of All Time

Every year, we come into the season with high hopes for our teams. Without fail, injuries, steroids, or boneheaded moves take our athletes off the field, killing our hopes and dreams for our team’s Championship aspirations.

InGameNow has decided to turn our focus on Fictional Sports Athletes. Not only are they much cooler than the modern day athlete, but you can count on them to be on the field, every time you hit play.

As the Spring 2009 TV season comes to a close, now is a great time to que up the Netflixs for some great summer viewing. If you are looking to scratch the sports itch, here are the All-Time top 10 Fictional Athletes.

10. Lucy Draper, Necessary Roughness, 1991

Easily the hottest athlete on this list, in Kathy Ireland’s hay day she was everywhere, TV, Sports Illustrated swimsuit covers, clothing lines, and movie roles. In Necessary Roughness not only did Ireland bring a little hotness to the movie, she also lead the way to the ill-fated, and short lived idea that girls could kick footballs at the college level. We all know how that turned out, *cough* Gary Barnett *cough*.
Why not include a Necessary Roughness clip??? Simple: we needed one good bikini video in this post.

9. Shooter McGavin, Happy Gilmore, 1996

How can you not love to hate old Shooter? In the best trash talking scene in sports history he dropped this gem

Never has a movie character portrayed the stuffiness of the PGA tour quite like Shooter. We just hope that this guy never found him, or else he may very well no longer be living.

8. Paul Crewe, The Longest Yard, 1974

In the original The Longest Yard, Burt Reynolds played a convincing role of a star football player sent to jail, and then forced to play a football game of inmates vs. guards. Reynolds played the character to a tee, and in the end leaves you somewhat invested in team Mean Machine. Plus who other than Reynolds can deliver a line like “[Drunkenly as a short policeman comes to arrest him] Look what we have here -- a miniature cop!” Got to love when drunk driving was still a laughable joke in popular culture.

7. Michael Jordan, Space Jam, 1996

He was in Space Jam as himself. I was born in Chicago in the mid 80’s and raised here in the 90’s. Nuff said.

6. Ricky “Wild Thing” Vaughn, Major League, 1989

InGameNow is a big fan of characters that can balance a criminal life with professional sports. Maybe Mike Vick should talk to Wild Thing seeing as Vaughn came out of the penal league as well to achieve professional success. Whether Wild Thing was attempting to throw heaters at batters or women he was always successful, even taking team rival Roger Dorn’s smoking hot wife to the sack. If there is anything we support, it is taking teammates wives to the sack, always a solid way to build unity.

5. Ivan Drago, Rocky IV, 1985

Okay we know Rocky IV was amazing, the best Rocky ever in fact, and the main reason is a big Russian man that went by the name of Ivan Drago. Never have four words by a single character ever resounded quite like “I Must Break You” to convey just how evil a character could be. Ivan used every conceivable way to gain the advantage, only to fall to the small American with resolve. We also love the fact that Drago was portrayed as on steroids, and Rocky was not, when in real life the converse was true.

4. Kenny Powers, Eastbound and Down, 2009

Our most recent character to make the list is one Kenny Powers, the star of Eastbound and Down. InGameNow is not the same since the debut of Eastbound and Down. I have picked up some of Mr. Powers communication skills; my girlfriend and friends are not a fan of this development. We only put “real” athletes on our list, no one allowed that is trying to be the best at exercising.

3. Sam Malone, Cheers, 1982-1993

Cheers is one of the best sitcoms of all time. Period. Whether Mayday Malone was in the gutter or sober he still always managed to pull smoking hot girls and keep his hair looking perfect. Cheers also brought in the stars for cameos with Wade Boggs, Kevin McHale, and Luis Tiant all making appearance over the course of the shows run. It is also notable that pretty much every athlete from TV or the Movies in the 70’s and 80’s were depicted to have a serious alcohol problem, we did not realize as more current media does that athletes rarely have substance abuse problems these days. At least we know where Emmitt Smith, and Shannon Sharpe learned how to broadcast.

2. Steve Latimer, The Program, 1993

What can we say about Latimer or The Program other than BAD ASS. Whether Latimer was drawing insane skulls on his face prior to games, smashing his head through car windows when he got his place at the table, replacing dirty urine with clean urine to beat drug tests, lifting weights to the point of convulsions, or getting to rough with the ladies; he was the stereotype of what was viewed as wrong with college sports in the Nineties. Furthermore with
Joey Lauren Adams, Halle Berry, and the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer Kristy Swanson it may also have one of the most underrated smoking hot female casts of all time.

1. Al Bundy, Married with Children, 1987-1997

Al Bundy is the epitome of the everyman athlete. Holding the Chicago City League record for most touchdowns in a single game(4), Al was a stud on the field. Bundy was also the cautionary tale to the American youth in late 80’s and early 90’s, no he was not warning against drugs and alcohol, instead he informed the youth that if they wanted to achieve there dreams, one of the keys was to ignore woman and refuse to let them tie you down. Kids, Al is completely right, woman are on this earth to steal away your athletic aspirations. Like Bundy, InGameNow headquarters is filled with people that still are wearing their high school jerseys and letterman jackets.

Although the above listed characters are fictional, there is always examples of when life imitates art.

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