Miami Caliente vs. Chicago Bliss LFL Opener
7 Sep
The much anticipated Lingerie Football League kicked of in Chicago when the Bliss hosted the Miami Caliente. There were a lot of questions as to whether or not the game would even happen, after all the past two years of Lingerie Bowls have been cancelled. Well, the game did happen, and despite a few hickups, the game was great.
Positives about the LFL
Intensity
The Lingerie Football League girls get paid based on wins and losses. To be totally honest, this is a brilliant idea. I love that athletes get paid for wins. All leagues should adopt this strategy. Could you imagine some of the great sideline fights we would have, after a player makes a boneheaded play? The LFL girls played dirty. Considering they were playing on turf, in Bra and Panties, this game was as fierce as possible.
Cat Fights
Outside of Jerry Springer, I have never witnessed so many cat fights. These girls wanted to kill each other. There is something appealing about watching a very attractive girl elbow another hottie in the chin.
Wardrobe Malfunctions
How can you beat watching models play football in bra and panties? Simple, adding wardrobe malfunctions. Luckily for those in attendance, there were more than a few.
High Level of Play
The girls played the game at a very high level. On Miami’s first scoring drive, there was a 40 yard passing play. While it was clear that the QB and WR for Miami were head and shoulders above the rest of the girls, all in all everyone played at a very good level.
Negatives about the LFL
Heavyweights
There is no question that the Miami Caliente were the hotter team. Roughly 75% of Miami were 9’s or 10’s. The other 25% were definitely attractive (although not hot enough to leave your wife for). All in all, the team was stacked. On the other hand, Chicago was playing some big girls. At most, 25% of the Bliss would be considered hot. It was clear that some of the Chicago girls had 30-50 lbs. on the Caliente players.
When the LFL was doing promos, all of the girls were sexy. On the field, it was clear that there were some less attractive ringers. The game would be much better with a weight limit to the players. I don’t need to see a 160 lbs. girl running over a hot 115 lbs. model. I want to see sexy girls who are also athletic.
Lack of Fans
The LFL claimed the game would be near sold out. Apparently selling 20% of the available seats is “near sold out.” There were probably 2000 people at the game. Part of the reason was the game was held 30 miles outside of Chicago. I am baffled at how stupid the LFL marketing is. Why they didn’t offer busing from a few different bars in the city, I will never know. Who wants to drive 30 miles on one of the biggest DUI busting weekends of the year. It would have been so easy to get 500 roudy twenty somethings in the crowd, adding energy to the arena.
It should be stated that once the game started, the fans went crazy. The girls really did play at a high level, and it was clear from the fans reaction that people had a great time.
Worst Halftime Show Ever
The halftime show was 4 dudes having a dance off. Who in marketing thought this would be a good idea? 95% of the fans were white males. (There were some hot females in the crowd, most were either mothers or friends of the players) Next time, lets get some of the players to come out and have a touchdown dance contest.
Pregame Sucked
The LFL marketed the event as starting at 3 p.m. Due Scary Mary breaking up my pregame drinking, I got to the game an hour before I wanted to (an hour before kickoff). We watched 4 semi-attractive girls throw towels to the 200 fans who made the mistake of getting to the game early.
Refs were Blind
Most flag football refs could have done a better job with the game. ‘Nuff Said.
Lack of Security
The LFL did not spend any money on security for the event. Anyone could buy an $8 ticket and walk down to the nice seats. Usually sporting events will have some security, for the players, and the fans. This had none. (* FYI, if you are going to go to a game, buy the cheapest tickets and walk up close*)
The Chicago Bliss ended up beating the Miami Caliente 29-19. All in all, the game was a blast. I would go again. If the LFL is near you, it is worth going. And if you ever have had a fantasy of getting your ass kicked by 14 girls in Lingerie, this is your chance….nothing is stopping you from running onto the field!
